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Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Theme Thursday for June 12, 2014 - LONELY

LONELY


This weeks new theme is LONELY!

I am not sure how being alone is different than being lonely but it is.
I like being alone but not feeling lonely.
For the past few months I have been feeling lonely.
Here is why:

I had some tests taken because I have been sick for quite a while.
At first my Doctor thought it was my thyroid and so he wanted me to take some tests,
just to check and make sure that was all it was.

I get a call from him a few days later that I need to come see him as soon as possible.
Okay, that does not sound good.
I go in a few days later to see him.
We are in the room and he looks at my chart and then he looks at me
and tells me that I am dying.  
That all my tests are off the charts
and that all my vital organs are going to quit working in two to three months.
All I could say was, "Oh".
What does one say when you are told that you are going to die in a few months.
I finally was able to ask what was wrong.
He said my heart has weakened due to all the mini strokes I have been having
for the past 15 years.
At least I think that is what he said is the cause of it.
I cannot remember much of the conversation because your brain
just keeps repeating the part about I'm dying.
Then he says, "But I am going to do my best to save you."
I'm thinking then why did you tell me I am dying.
Anyway he gives me a big list of new meds that I have to take.
I now have a basket full of meds.
I gag because I have to take so many.

But back to feeling lonely.
I feel lonely because I could not talk to anyone about this.
I tried to talk to oldest granddaughter and grandson but they started to freak out,
and so I just said I was just kidding.
Then I knew that anyone I told about this would freak out too.
This is why I feel lonely, I have no one to talk to about this.
And I also realize that if my Doc does save me then anyone I told
would have gotten upset for no reason.

Truly feeling lonely does not feel good.
Being alone is just fine.

So how about you!
Do you ever feel lonely?
Are you okay if you are alone?
If you know someone who feels lonely, do you try to help them?
What do you think about lonely?

Please come back on Thursday
and let us know your feelings about lonely.

See you Thursday,
Thanks again,
Mrsupole

Hey Mr. Linky is early again!

5 comments:

  1. Much love Mrsupole! Will keep you in my prayers.

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  2. That just freaked me out too. But you sound strong and composed. Hope for the best and be prepared for the worst. I am posting some not so lonely photos.

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  3. You certainly have every reason to feel lonely...though, rest assured, your blogging friends are here and wishing you all the best and offering their support. As an RN for almost fifty years, I never ceased being saddened by diagnoses such as yours that offered little hope...but there is ALWAYS hope. Never give up.

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  4. Ugh...Google ate my comment. :-(
    I am wishing the best for you. I hate when bad things happen to good people.
    My piece is here.
    http://thecheesewhines.wordpress.com/2014/06/12/loneliness/

    ReplyDelete